Creative setbacks, criticism and dealing with unhelpful remarks

One of the hardest things to deal with when you offer your creative work, soul, being, performance up for judgement is dealing with the criticism that comes with it, and more and more nasty and hateful comments which also seem more prevalent these days. Today, more and more of us are putting our work online, getting our art out there, and the internet is the most amazing empowering tool to allow a new generation of creatives an outlet for their passions, their soul, their art.There has never been a better time to be a creative, to grab the power back when it comes to your creations and find your creative path. Having said that, there is a downside, a downside that isn't just limited to comments on the internet, but also something that professional creatives have to deal with, usually on a daily basis, and that is negative criticisms which are outright bashing of your work. Usually in the form of unhelpful and nasty comments, and personal attacks on something that we no doubt hold very dear. It is really hard (and extremely unhelpful!) to be told that your work is 'crap', 'rubbish' or 's**t', or to be told that you have no idea how to do your job.So how do we deal with this? What can we learn from these negative experiences? On the whole, and particularly when it comes to the internet, it is easy to be a critic and it is easy to have an opinion, and with access to the billions of people on this planet these opinions will vary considerably. Are you trying to please 6 billion people? Or just those who really appreciate what you do? In life there are always 50 + shades of grey in an opinion or view and it is important to remember that. Are you satisfied with the piece of work? That should always be the first opinion to listen to, if the answer is NO then fix it, change it, adjust it until you are happy and satisfied. Of course, sometimes we are never fully satisfied and this is our creative cross to bare. But, we should always be learning from the work we create and trying to find new and better way to improve on what we are doing, or looking at past work to see how we would like to do things differently.Back to the internet, it is easy to sit behind a keyboard anonymously and type hurtful and unhelpful comments, knowing full well that  they are 'anonymous' and probably wouldn't actually say such things if we met them personally. But when the cristism is face to face from someone we know, that is when it is harder, and I try to take the following approach. Taking an NLP strategy, ask yourself the following questions

  1. What's in it for them?
  2. What is their motivation?
  3. What are they aiming to achieve?
  4. How is their life right now - happy or unhappy?
  5. What are they getting from this?
  6. What do they want from me right now?
  7. Is anything in their comment justified?

Listen to the way the comment is pharsed, is it helpful?We all need constructive criticism to improve, all of us. Listen to the tone....is the comment simply...you're rubbish? If so, ignore it.Is it along the lines of 'oh my god, how can you do that...don't you know what you are doing?'...If so, ignore it.Sometimes just ask the simple question, the person who is providing you a nasty remark, unhelpful critsism etc, who are they and what have they done? Sometimes, it is easy to be an armchair critic, perhaps resting on laurels from yesteryear, it is always easy to find fault in anything if you set your mind to it. If you respect the person and their work, then it is easier to take criticism, in fact some of us would give anything for our peers to view our work, but hopefully they would give us something more useful then....you are rubbish!If there is one lesson to be learnt, I would say it is just do i, create your 'art' give it to the world. If you are happy with it, then that is enough! Create art, as Seth Godin would say, make it yours, believe in it, believe in yourself, strive to improve everyday, be your toughest criticPeaceNeil